Yesterday I was in the grocery store and I overheard a woman speaking on her phone. Her conversation went something like this. “Yeah, well, I don’t even know why I try. It’s not going to work out for me anyway. It never does. I can’t do anything right, and I certainly can’t do this.”
I wondered if this woman actually HEARD what she was saying to herself. Throughout our lives we will encounter people who are naysayers. Pessimists. People who believe that if you imagine good things happening to you, you will somehow jinx the process. Those people are the people that Julia Cameron describes as being censors. We all have them. They are not the cheerleaders, optimists or champions. They do not support our dreams or if they do, it is only superficial. They are the doubters, the skeptics and cynics. These are the people that easily put the “buts” and “shoulds” into our thoughts. They are the ones that keep the fear of soaring alive.
This woman in the grocery store clearly had heard those words before, and as a result, she believed them. That belief about who she is influences every aspect of her life. She may not know it, but on some subconscious level, she believes that she will always be a failure. The interesting thing is that she didn’t come into this world as a new born babe, saying those things to herself. She had to be taught to think that way. The doubters, skeptics and cynics are most often the people that have the greatest influence in our lives: our parents, our teachers, our bosses or co-workers. And as a result of exposure to those limiting beliefs, many of us become our own worse censors.
It would be easy to place blame on those that have taught us to doubt. Yet, that would not allow us to live our best lives. Through no fault of their own, our censors also learned these false beliefs and integrated them into their own thoughts, actions and words. When we are able to sit back and observe that cyclical process, we are able to acknowledge the doubt and the pain without judgment. It is then that we are able to release the blame and move forward.
Moving forward may not be easy but when we are able to release fear and doubt and beliefs that limit our potential, we are able to soar and to feel free. The first step to doing this is to listen to the words that we tell ourselves. Do they tend to be more positive or negative? Are they truly YOUR words or did someone else say them to you? Do you want to continue to believe the words or do you consciously choose to use other more positive words and affirmations?
What you say to yourself, the words you use, and the thoughts you think create your experience. Whatever it was that the woman in the grocery store was pursuing, I am sure that she did not receive it. Her words became her experience: it did not work out.
What words do you use? Do you tell yourself not to trust, not to believe, not to hope? Do you tell yourself that you are no good, or lazy, or incompetent? Do you use the words like “should have” or “I can’t”? Trend carefully, for these are the words that create your experience.
Yet there is something else here that is critical to consider; for although words like these are limiting, they are NOT the truth. The truth is that we are Sacred beings, and as sacred beings, we are sourced in the Divine, the Good. When we step into that truth, our words change: “I CAN”, “I COULD if I choose”, “it IS possible”.
The next time you are on the phone talking about your hopes and dreams, listen to the words you use.
What is it that to you want to hear?